Stuart and Verity began their adoption journey a few years after having their birth daughter, Lola. It had taken them a while to get pregnant with her, and so considered adoption as a different route to grow their family further.
They attended a really informative session, that reaffirmed this was the right next step for them. They began the process in September 2020, and were paired with an incredible social worker who helped educate them about what to expect. After being approved in March 2021, they were quickly matched with their son, Edward*, who was four months old at the time.
Stuart and Verity opted for the early permanence route, which involves birth family contact to understand whether staying with them might be best for the child. Verity asked Edward’s birth mum lots of questions – her music taste, her favourite things, what makes her happy. She found out she loves music and listened to lots while she was pregnant with Edward, which Verity thinks is why he has such a musical ear. She wanted to find all this out so she can tell her son, when he’s older, all about his mum and where he came from. They regularly read Edward’s life story book, and while only being 3, in an age-appropriate way they are open with him about his story. They’ve kept lots of his artwork and special items to show his birth mother one day.
Throughout their journey, their daughter Lola knew and understood that they were adopting, and they specifically remember the moment they told her they had found a match – she was so excited! Lola is very protective of her baby brother and adapted to the role of big sister straight away. Verity feels they have a bond thicker than blood.
Their foster carers have played a particularly important role in their journey, and have become an extension of their family, even buying Lola a present when it was time for Edward to go home with them. They helped them navigate the transition process, shared advice, and they have continued to stay in touch – regularly texting about milestones in their children’s lives, attending birthday parties and more. They see them as an extra set of grandparents.
Speaking about their adoption journey, they say: “We love our blended family – and are proof that blood relation doesn’t matter when it comes to building a family. Our children, despite not being birth siblings, are thick as thieves and couldn’t love each other more. Adoption has brought so many joys to our life – from our beautiful boy showing off his musical talents in the kitchen, to the frequent visits from his foster carers who feel like family.”
“We would tell anyone thinking about adoption to do your research, trust the process and leverage your support network, but enjoy every step – our adoption journey is continuing to take us to incredible places.”
*names have been changed to protect identity